Dear Reader, I'm sorry to say that the book you are holding in your handsis extremely unpleasant. It tells an unhappy tale about three very unluckychildren. Even though they are charming and clever, the Baudelaire siblingslead lives filled with misery and woe. From the very first page of thisbook when the children are at the beach and receive terrible news,continuing on through the entire story, disaster lurks at their heels. Onemight say they are magnets for misfortune. In this short book alone, thethree youngsters encounter a greedy and repulsive villain, itchy clothing,a disastrous fire, a plot to steal their fortune, and cold porridge forbreakfast. It is my sad duty to write down these unpleasant tales, butthere is nothing stopping you from putting this book down at once andreading something happy, if you prefer that sort of thing. With all duerespect,Lemony Snicket