Dear Reader, You are presumably looking at the back of this book, orthe end of the end. The end of the end is the best place to begin the end,because if you read the end from the beginning of the beginning of the endto the end of the end of the end, you will arrive at the end of the end ofyour rope. This book is the last in A Series of Unfortunate Events, andeven if you braved the previous twelve volumes, you probably can't standsuch unpleasantries as a fearsome storm, a suspicious beverage, a herd ofwild sheep, an enormous bird cage, and a truly haunting secret about theBaudelaire parents. It has been my solemn occupation to complete thehistory of the Baudelaire orphans, and at last I am finished. You likelyhave some other occupation, so if I were you I would drop this book atonce, so the end does not finish you. With all due respect, LemonySnicket