THE SOPRANOS

The choir from our Lady of Perpetual Succour School for Girls is beingbussed to the national finals in the big, big city. And it's an importantday for the Sopranos - Orla, Kylah, (Ra)Chell, Amanda Konky and Fionnula(the Cooler) - pub-crawling, shoplifting and body-piercing being the toppriorities. Then it's time to lose that competition - lose, because anuclear sub has just anchored in the bay and, tonight, the Man Trap discowill be full of submariners on shore-leave. There is no time fordelays...But after the fifth bottle of alco-pop up the back of the busit's clear that all is not going to plan, for anyone. The Sopranos arenever going to be the same.